My Not so Normal Life with Crohns Disease
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IT CATCHES UP WITH YOU

4/21/2015

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This post is written by Karen Brocker, my mom, about what it is like to have a daughter with a chronic illness.
When you live with a chronic disease you sometimes become accustomed to dealing with serious, even scary,  health issues.  This becomes your new normal and you learn to function as if everything were fine.   

I find myself in a cycle of sorts…. something kind of big happens and I go into a function mode to deal with the immediate needs.  I call the doctor, I pick up meds,  I go to an appointment.   I might even google the issue.  Other than that, though, I am not thinking about it too much.  I am  fitting it into my schedule of tasks and everyday responsibilities.

The next phase of the cycle is that I go into an avoidance phase.  I become a bit obsessed with a project.  I may research  vacation spots.  I decorate. I wish I would exercise obsessively but I’m afraid that has not yet happened. I latch on to anything that provides a mental distraction from the stalking heaviness that threatens to overtake me.  

Eventually, I come to a stand still, aware that my feelings have caught up with me and that it is time to deal with them.  I may weep, cry out to God and even take a nap.  The heaviness settles until it is dispersed by the quietness that comes with acceptance.  I acknowledge the sorrow and  the fear and then soldier on in this journey of my daughter’s not so normal life.
3 Comments

Is Perfect really Perfect?

11/6/2013

1 Comment

 
Although they do not know exactly what causes Crohns Disease, there have been many studies that suggest that stress can cause a Crohns patient to flare.  This is crappy news for any college student with Crohns, because guess what!? College is stressful...like really stressful.
So I get stressed from tests and being sick, and then my Crohns gets worse.  Great.  Well then I'm stressed about getting sicker, and my Crohns gets worse.  Fantastic.  But then it gets even better, because I get even more stressed about getting sicker, and I get even more sick....and the cycle just keeps going till I am so sick that I can't do school anymore.  Well then I'm stressed because I am too sick to do school and I end up in the hospital.
Do you see the problem here?  Being sick makes me stressed and being stressed makes me sick.  It's a dangerous combination, especially for a Type A personality like myself.  After realizing how dangerous this cycle can be, I began looking for a way to neutralize this cycle's affects on my body.
In short, I need to learn to be less stressed, but to me that is an impossible feat.  So I begin to look for ways to reduce stress in my life, while maintaining a level of achievement that I can be happy with.  A very supportive and loving Chi Omega sister shared a quote with me recently that will help me achieve a lower lever of stress.  She like myself is a very high achiever, always striving to give her all in every situation.  My dear sister recently shared this quote with me, "sometimes done is better then perfect."   This quote has stuck with me, because as a type A personalities I want perfection, but will obsessing over perfection make me happy, or will it make me stressed and miserable?  I am not saying I should stop trying or turn in subpar work, but I am saying that my health and surviving is more important then obsessing over every single assignment.  Getting an A is not worth ending up in the hospital.  I've learned that perfect isn't all it's crack-up to be...

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I have also come to realize that I need to make time to relax, and to focus on things that make me happy.   I sincerely enjoy just turning on a TV show and watching a show with my wonderfully supportive boyfriend.  We are basically doing nothing, but in this circumstance, doing nothing makes us both so happy.   So we set aside time to do nothing together, and it helps reduce the stress level.  Because we have planned it into our day, we know that we are going to get our work done, but for that 30 minutes, we are not going to focus on our work, we are going to simply enjoy being together, and this is wonderful.
I think college students and IBD patients should all reflect on how they can reduce stress in their life, because being stressed isn't healthy for anyone.  In fact I am probably going to blog about how stress effects the body just so I can prove my point, but seriously look at your life and figure out simple ways that you can reduce stress so you can live a happy healthier life!  Hopefully I will continue to find ways to reduce stress and be healthier in my not so normal life.
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    I've got 8 scars and am missing two feet of intestines and my life isn't normal, but whose life is normal?  I want to use my experiences to help you, even if it means sharing embarrassing experiences. I am also looking to break the stigmas associated with IBD in order to make living with IBD just a little bit easier. Hope you enjoy!

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