Everyone's stomach makes noise at some point in time, but I truly wonder what the people around me think when my stomach does an exact imitation of a babbling brook and then sounds like a bomb has exploded. This really isn't an exaggeration, well not much of one anyway, and if I didn't think it was mildly amusing I'd probably be embarrassed, but it's hard to be embarrassed about bodily noises after living with Crohns for so long. You kind of get used to strange noises coming from all parts of your body...but church is one of the worst places for my monster to act up.
In fact it only seemed to become active when the pastor would say, "join me in prayer." It was like my monster was saying, "YOU BETTER SAY A PRAYER!" But of course it's in monster language so I only hear "BA-BLOOOB-BOOM-BABABA-BOOP!" Whenever this happens in the dead silence I put my hand over my abdomen, wishing that it would quiet the noise, and then quickly realize that people are going to think I'm pregnant if I keep holding my belly. So, instead I send a silent prayer that my little monster would learn to be quiet so that I could be somewhat normal in my not so normal life.